Sunday, March 27, 2011

Those who sit on the fence......

To sit on the fence :
To remain neutral on a certain topic, to not have a stance or opinion. 
Check source here

This practice is followed by a large majority of people. In words and actions, by bookies, punters, politicians, voters, players, followers and so on. All prefer to wait and watch and then form or change their opinion. And why not, always better to know what's likely to be there ahead, if and when you do decide to go ahead.

The best example of this are live - in relationships. Not sure you can stay together, try out for sometime, stay as a married couple. If it works out, great else walk out. No commitment! I wonder if it is as easy as that. Not so much a custom in India, but more in western countries i believe. Here, the idea is tried out in a more subtle manner(if at all). But the practice spending (wasting?) time together to try and understand each other exists - doesn't matter 6 months after marriage the person / family we married is completely different from what we perceived it to be. So in that sense, sitting on the fence with a live in relationship makes sense. Lesser risk of things going wrong later.

They may go wrong earlier though....

To my mind this idea is stupid. They say for a successful marriage you need trust. I would also say commitment.And that is developed by staying in the same house and seeing what time the other person brushes his teeth???? If you have spent enough time with someone to be willing to stay with her / him, you have spent enough time to know the person. I would say its just a tactic used by people scared of commitment but wanting to enjoy the good part of marriage - sharing time, splitting bills and yes the sex. (Don't believe Salaam Namaste's 'we had it by mistake and then carried on' story). Convenient. Problem is, in the clutter of these many things, also come in clash of egos, variance in habits and the trivial-est of reasons would lead to a split. Happens more often than not, because you are sitting on the fence, you there is the easier way out if you don't like the fact that the guy is a soccer fan or farts too much!

I think it also has to do with people not wanting to be held responsible for their lives decisions in case things do not work out......

Customers are 'fence sitters'. My first boss, i forgot his name (man, i am getting old!), was in sales for 20 years. One of the early advices he gave me was to learn how to identify the 'fence sitter' customers because they waste the most time. We did cold calls, just walk in to an office and make our pitch. He would always say focus on those who are willing to know more and more about the company, about the product in the first meeting itself. That guy is forming an opinion and quick. The quicker you respond, the higher chances of him getting converted.The fence sitter would ask for a quote, seek obvious details, try to humour you, not commit on when to expect reply, make up follow up endlessly and waste your time. He may also be converted, so you don't ignore him - but as they say, he reduces your productivity.

Sitting on the fence can be good to. In certain way, all good classical batsmen, who see the ball till the last minute and then decide to hit accordingly are fence sitters. No premeditated shots, just a bit of instinct honed by hours of practice.

The funny thing is - Some people say I am a fence sitter(well, its a good thing to do na, when not so close friends ask advice?), some say i have strong opinions, almost a bias(well, Japanese Korean cars are too light!!!). I just have opinions which i express strongly or otherwise as and when required.(this blog has a label called “opinions”!).

This post by itself has no meaning.The above is part of a "blog-off" .My friend and I decided to write blogs on the word "Sit" (yeah, sorry we couldn't get a better word). It could be title, theme or story - anything that suggested itself when you heard the word. The above is mine, I'll sit on the fence and wait for your opinions before making up my mind on whether I'll post that link or not!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

You have strong opinions! Read that label.....